6:45 PM: There is an event scheduled tonight where teachers meet for coffee with students and shoot the shit. People are cautiously optimistic. We arrive at the coffee house and there are three people there.
6:50: People sit down and start talking. Much to our relief, more students arrive. I am talking with one guy who I know is really cool, another student I haven't seen before and another student who is cute and my age. Things are good.
7:30: I drank too much tea. Time to make wee-wee.
7:45: It's clear that two of the students are much more advanced than the other one and he's a little uncomfortable. At one point he gets up and runs away, either to answer a sales call or because he doesn't want us to see him cry. Realistically, it could have been both.
8:45: The event is over, people have to get home. I plan on going to a local bar and watching people play poker. Two of the female students suggest that me and two other teachers go to a karaoke bar instead. I have a crush on one of the girls so I agree.
9:30: We arrive at KTV (the karaoke bar) and get settled in. I sing "Jessie's Girl", "Harder, Better, Faster" and "Africa". During "Jessie's Girl", one of the ladies we're with leans over to me and asks, "who is James' girl?" I realize that she's implying I like her friend, which I do. Clever. A little later, I learn that she likes me too. Life is good.
9:31: I hear the girl has a boyfriend in Shanghai. Time to cut the brakes on his bicycle. A girl calls me "flower-hearted" in Chinese. I nearly punch her. I am then told it means, "flirt" or "player" in English. I nearly punch her.
10:00: Some more girls arrive. They are awkward and harshing the vibe. I don't understand the lyrics to the songs anymore because they're either songs by Chinese singers or Nelly. Eventually we leave to go eat, which is neat because I forgot to eat dinner.
10:30 We meet more of their friends at an area in Wuxi famous for street vendor food. I am glad I'm not allergic to MSG, because I'm about to eat a lot of it.
11:00: Everyone is cool, even the awkward girls. I realize this is the first time I've been out with a group of Chinese people my age. I am told one of the guys in the group is a great drinker. It turns out he is not. I am disappointed.
11:30: All the friends leave and the original two girls tell us that we should go to another restaurant to eat "the rice in water". I assumed this was an old Chinese sexual metaphor until I learned they were talking about porridge. Both girls are cute and I have been drinking so naturally I agree.
12:00 There is in fact porridge at this restaurant, along with chicken feet. Memories.
12:30: Me and one girl persuade the other girl and the other remaining teacher to go to a club. The girls have been paying for everything so far and this annoys the other teacher. Me being a feminist, I have no objections to this, even if it makes me obligated later.
12:45: We are at the club and we get my least favorite drink in the whole world, whiskey and green tea. Chinese people always mix too much tea, making a buzz hard to obtain. Here I learn that the girl I like is neither into drinking or dancing. Shit.
1:00: Resorting to my playbook from back home, I start dancing and flirting with the other girl in order to make the girl I like jealous. This goes over like the Vienna Boys Choir singing "Single Ladies" in that it is momentarily amusing but has an overall negative effect.
3:00: We close the club down, and I realize that I may have just sacrificed long-term progress for short-term gain. Oops. The girl I like is now getting a little emo and we leave shortly thereafter.
3:45: Fun-time over. A cab drops me and the other teacher off at home and I throw 10 yuan at one of the girls who still doesn't want us to pay. The next day is slightly awkward. Go team.
Friday, April 3, 2009
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